At this point I don’t know what to believe, or say, when it comes to the new Bryan Singer directed X-Men: Days of Future Past. Not just about the movie as a whole, but rather what they are doing to one character in particular. One grey wig flaunting, shiny pants flashing, goggles-for-the-sake-of-goggles wearing Quicksilver, played by Evan Peters. When the first pictures came out, I was all like… whaaaaa??? And then when more pictures came out, I was all like huuuuuhh???

I feel really confused about all of this. I really do. I am not even trying to be funny at this point. I am just horribly confused, so confused and baffled that it literally makes my head hurt. Now I know how Paul must feel… going through life confused by all the colors and shapes, all the “WYE-FYE”  this and “CELL-PHONE” that. Poor guy.

But lets take a look at the exactly what I am so confused. The following promotional video shows us the brand new “X-Man” Quicksilver, eating breakfast. YUP. That’s right. I said eating breakfast, specifically A Carl’s Jr. breakfast sandwich. (WARNING – the images you are about to see are considered extremely stupid, and should not be watched by those easily angered)

So there you have it. That is him eating breakfast. It is so damn absurd I just cannot for the life of me think of a good reason they would continue to show us this character, when he looks SO HORRIBLY RIDICULOUS. But I think I finally figured it out (Paul, not so much). I think I have narrowed it down to two options –

Option 1 – The marketing team at FOX is nothing but geniuses. The team is probably stacked full of Nobel Laureates, people doing ground breaking work in the fields of physics, chemistry, economics, and other thingies. They are so smart, that they actually understand the internet… THE ENTIRE INTERNET. They understand it to the point of the old saying “any press is good press,” which if I understand the 21st Century correctly, roughly translates into something called “Trolling” (I think?). Now Trolling is basically intentionally making  controversial statements or comments, with the sole intention of evoking an emotional response. And if that video of a comic book character, dressed like a complete idiot, selling a giant corporations breakfast sandwich isn’t purposefully trying to evoke an emotional response, then I don’t know what is. They are basically trolling every person on earth, just to get people talking about their movie. And its working. Kind of.

Option 2 – The costume designers for this movie were literally a group of blind cigarette smoking chimps, who had access to a 1980’s hair metal bands wardrobe closet, and Bryan Singer is making the biggest mistake of his career. The movie will break records, it will be a box office smash, but it will be laughed at. Once again, just like in X-Men: First Class (listen to our review of that here), a great story line and a handful of great actors and characters will be trampled on and overshadowed by annoying teenager “mutants,” the other horribly shallow characters, and laughable costume design. So much so that it will tarnish the entire movie. I’m calling it now, this will be so glaring that it will effect peoples opinion on the whole movie. The most we can hope is that he is not a central character, and has very little screen time.

But what do I know? I’m just a guy who doesn’t dress up like this…

Don’t dress like this.