Where are Jake’s Articles? That’s a Clown Question, bro…

What’s up Cinema Recon-ites!? Hows it hangin’? I was thinking today about some articles I wanted to write, and holy hell! Has it really been that long since I threw up an article!? Seems like just yesterday I was talking about The Expendables 2 trailer exploding all over your face, but now that I think about it – not including our regular podcasts – that was over a month ago! Its amazing what happens to all my free time to write once summer starts rolling around. I’ve been a tad bit busy to say the least – a couple camping trips where we got snowed on, fishing trips where all I caught was a good buzz, river rafting trip where I caught a nice sunburn, toured the Anheuser-Busch Brewery and almost got kicked out, a couple baseball games and a whole helluva lot of beers later and here I am slacking on my writing responsibilities to you, the reader! (hi mom)

But fear not, I have all the time in the world to write today thanks to the lovely folks at Clarke Pest Control who are fumigating our apartment complex for termites. We had to pack up all our shit and will be staying at the lovely Extended Stay America for the next three days. At first I thought Cassie said we were staying at Extended Steak America, and immediately thought we were staying at some sort of super awesome hotel that serves you steak and eggs for breakfast, steak sandwiches for lunch, and fish sticks for dinner (come on now, you can’t eat steak three times a day). Anyways, we went to the A’s game yesterday then came home and had to pack up our whole damn place. “So what?” you might think. Yeah, not that bad, except have you ever tried to move the contents of a 16 gallon fish tank to the second floor hotel room of an Extended Stay America? Yeah I didn’t think so! So shut it! Sorry, I didn’t mean that I am just a little testy since I pretty much didn’t sleep at all. The freaking bed sheets are like cardboard wrapped in god damn sandpaper at this place, its like sleeping between two belt sanders. But the good news is at least the shower drains properly, oh wait… right, it doesn’t. Nothing gives you that clean morning shower feeling like 4″ of standing water at the bottom of a hotel room shower. God only knows what exists beyond that drain…

But the reason I have time to write today, isn’t because of our fabulous hotel makes it such a serene environment to write, its because of moving a bunch of damn fish into a hotel, the limestone-like bed sheets, the bath/shower combo, and yes most likely having a couple too many $8 beers at the game yesterday… but I took today off!! Yesterday wore me the hell out and since I basically didn’t sleep at all, I just needed to relax today. Bad for my employer, good for you! So I’m hoping to get out a couple articles that I have been wanting to write. So sit back, grab a cold one, and stare at your computer until I write these articles!


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