Category Archives: Banter

Prometheus Aliens Free to Drop F-Bombs!

[UPDATED 5/8/12]  Deadline is reporting that Fox has indeed confirmed the R rating for Prometheus.  This is an enormous risk for Fox.  Now we just need to show up, enjoy the hell out of this one, and send studio execs the message that an R rated summer blockbuster really can work.  …Its either that or we fall into another bleak decade of watered down PG-13 films that not even Die Hard or The Terminator could overcome.

[5/7/12]  20th Century Fox appears to agree with the rest of the planet and will not alter the content of Prometheus based upon the MPAA rating bestowed upon them.  We are basing this assumption on the surfacing of what appears to be a legitimate, early ticket stub for the highly anticipated film:

That right there, my friends, is a big fat R rating!  The ticket was scanned by IMDB user “dvonnesoneek” and subsequently the internets were alerted by comicbookmovie.com.

If this is truly the real deal, words cannot describe how happy this makes me.  While I understand that excessive violence and language does not a good movie make, I have always felt that the Alien franchise (or universe, or second removed cousins, or however else Ridley Scott wants to tie Prometheus to previous films) is one that deserves a serious, unaltered, adult tone.

We have seen what happens when a studio insists on being too much involved (Alien 3) and we have seen what happens when you take this content into the ticket-selling friendly realm of PG-13 (AvP).  A rated R Prometheus can only mean that Scott is being given the freedom to realize whatever vision he had for this film.

It would have been very easy to slap a PG-13 rating on this and bank on the extra ticket sales (especially considering the rumored hefty budget).  I applaud 20th Century Fox for having the testicular fortitude to make this decision, and will now block out the week surrounding June 8 in order to recover from my head exploding in anticipation.


The Avengers is Officially a Big Thing

In case you have been living under a rock that is wedged between two larger rocks and you don’t have internet access beneath said rock, The Avengers has officially released in the US today.  Already taking in $300+ million worldwide and having received rave reviews, it is safe to say this movie will set a few records.  If there was ever any doubts, they can be put to rest now: The Avengers is already a success.

Cinema Recon will be seeing the behemoth superhero adventure tonight at the AMC Van Ness in San Francisco.  It’s not a question of if you’ll see it, so I’ll ask, when are you going to catch it?  Did anyone go to the early showings?  Tell us what you thought!

Hey, has anyone seen Spidey or Wolv…oh, right


Expendables 2 Full Length Trailer! (Explosion: The Movie!)

It is finally here, what all red blooded males (and Paul) have been waiting for… the full length trailer for Expendables 2! Or as I like to call it Explosion: THE MOVIE! Finally, after bickering about ratings with Chuck Norris and between old ass action dudes drinking their Chocolate Raspberry Ensure and doing their water-aerobics and the local YMCA, they have managed to produced a full length trailer for Expendables 2! Hell Yeah! (queue explosion)…

I really kind of rip on the first Expendables because I think it feel so damn short of what everyone was expecting. Lots of quick cuts on the action scenes (but I guess what do you expect when all your stars are pushing 60… and walkers), the whole movie was really dark it was hard to see what the hell was going on, and it just didn’t deliver on making a movie as bad ass as the combined bad-assedness of all its stars. So needless to say, when we first heard about Explosion: THE MOVIE, I was skeptical. Then the big debate over the ratings started and it was reported that Expendables 2 would be PG-13, or else Chuck Norris would throw a temper tantrum, and most likely some uppercuts. I told Paul, the only way Expendables 2 could be any worse than the first Expendables was if they really do make this PG-13! But they have since went back and forth on the rating and word on the internet streets is that they have landed on an R rating however I don’t believe anything is official yet.

So with all that going on, I was far from being excited for the Expendables sequel. Sure, we will go see it (we do it for you! You see what you make us do!?) but I was already thinking it was going to be more of the same. Then I watch the trailer, and what can I say… I’m in! hahah! I don’t know what it is I must just be a sucker for giant explosions, crushing cars with tanks, mercenaries riding zip lines, motorcycles jumping off ramps into flying helicopters, wearing awesome sunglasses, dressing like a monk, and smart cars… (hey, they are good for the environment). But something about it was awesome enough to where I think it will be a good time all over again… even if it is a bad time all over again (which it most likely will be).

But the trailer scores high enough on my explosion meter, the Explometer© (Pronounced – EX, PLOM, E, TER) to make me fall for this whole thing all over again, and just gets me all giddy for a good old mindless action movie. So even if Expendables 2 sucks as bad as the first, I’m definitely lining up at the theater with the same enthusiasm as I had when this all started. Check out the trailer below and try to tell me you won’t be doing the same!? The Expendables 2 is set to open August 17th, 2012 in the United States of Awesome Explosions. Oh, and in case you are wondering, it scored an 8 on the Explometer©.


Lawless is All Sorts of Bad Ass… (UPDATED with Trailer!)

UPDATE! First Trailer for Lawless is out!

The first trailer has gone online for John Hillcoats Lawless, you can check it out below followed by the previous article I wrote about the film and its awesome cast. I think I was right on point with what I wrote in the article below, saying that this movie is going to be bad-freaking-ass. Don’t believe me? Just watch for yourself…

There has been a lot of talk lately about “super movies”… and I am not referring to super-hero movies. Although there is a shit load of talk about super-hero movies as well, yeah I’m looking at you AVENGERS. God damn it seems like I cant even take a shit without seeing some new Avengers images imprinted right there on the damn toilet paper. But I am not talking about super-hero movies. I’m talking about movies that are coming out that have spectacular casts. It’s like The Avengers, but real life actors… if that makes any sense. There are a couple flicks coming out that are just jam packed with amazing actors. Its almost too much to even imagine them all in one movie! It’s like the first time you heard about the whole cast for the remake of Oceans 11, let’s put it that way. I would list the movies I am talking about but lets face it: I’m lazy and you’re smarter than I am; you probably know them all.

One movie that I am really stoked for and therefore not  too lazy to mention is Lawless (formerly titled The Wettest County in the World), directed by John Hillcoat and based on a novel written by Matt Bondurant. The synopsis from IMDB is as follows – “Set in the Depression-era Franklin County, Virginia, a bootlegging gang is threatened by authorities who want a cut of their profits.” Ah yes, that is right up my alley. I am a big fan of the Depression-era look to movies, as well as the overall American attitude toward life and the law during that time. But to bring it back to my earlier point, what really gets me excited for this movie is the cast and crew…

First we have John Hillcoat directing, who previously directed The Proposition as well as The Road (both of which I think are pretty great films). The overall tone of his previous movies is what’s important and what will translate specifically well to Lawless. Second you have a screenplay by Nick Cave who also wrote the screenplay for Hillcoat’s The Proposition. But the big kicker here, ladies and gentleman and Paul, is the cast. Check this out… the film will star (deep breath) -

  • Tom “I’m extremely bad ass” Hardy
  • Shia LaBeouf – You can hate him all you want but personally I think he is a great actor.
  • Jessica Chastain – Who is nothing short of absolutely amazing.
  • Gary Oldman – Who is top on our list ‘ol chap!
  • Mia Wasikowska – Alice in Wonderland, Jane Eyre and The Kids Are Alright.
  • Guy Pearce – Come on… its Guy Pearce…
  • Noah Taylor – The Proposition and the upcoming Hatfields & McCoys
  • Dane DeHaan - Ultra believable bad super powers kid from Chronicle.
  • Jason Clarke – Public Enemeies and the upcoming The Great Gatsby.

With a cast like that it’s got to be good! OK, well it doesnt have  to be good, but my money is on the fact that it will be bad-freaking-ass. A bunch of bootleggers pushing moonshine and booze, outrunning the cops, and shooting shit up! With a great screenplay, director and phenomenal cast, they could probably make watching paint dry exciting! I am stoked… no, I am super-stoked! Lawless is scheduled to open in the post-prohibition USA August 31st, 2012.

You guys said there were seats back here!

What say you? Will a great cast make this a great movie? Or just another overloaded flop? Let us know in the comments!

P.S. Does anyone else think that John Hillcoat looks exactly like Stevie from East Bound and Down?


The Counselor Counsels an All Star Cast

So I talked about these so called “super movies” in my last article. Specifically I was talking about the upcoming John Hillcoat directed film Lawless (formerly titled The Wettest County in the World) based on the novel by Matt Bondurant. I was amazed at the awesome cast they have for this movie, and just excited in general about the bootlegging flick (Booze and guns!? Sign me up!). I also mentioned a couple other upcoming films that also have these super-amazing casts, but was too lazy to remember what they were. But this cup of coffee has chased away my laziness! Laziness be gone!

One of the other awesome-actor-packed movies that I was thinking of is the upcoming film The Counselor directed by an up-and-coming guy named Ridley Scott. He has a small little indie film called Prometheus coming out that you probably haven’t heard of… But much like Lawless The Counselor is packed to the brim with a great cast and a great director which should make this as I like to call it – a super-movie! (I really need to find a better term for that, it just sounds so 1980′s). The plot centers around well respected lawyer who partners up with a wealthy acquaintance of his and some shady associates, to try his hand in the cocaine business without getting caught up in it. Cormac McCarthy wrote the screenplay who also wrote the novel No Country for Old Men, so I can imagine this being in the same tone which sounds awesome. But again, what gets me excited is having an awesome director paired with a great writer, and then the following all star cast (some signed on, some still in talks) -

  • Michael Fassbender – Hi, I’m the best actor around right now!
  • Brad Pitt – Hey, I married Angelina Joile!
  • Angelina Jolie – Hey, Brad Pitt married me!
  • Javier Bardem – “Don’t put it in your pocket. It’s your lucky quarter.” Classic. Oh yeah, and I married Penelope Cruz!
  • Penelope Cruz – Hey, I married Javier Bardem!
So now that I think about it, this might just be a reason for all these married people to hang out together. Maybe they are trying to hook up Michael Fassbender with the make up artist or something… who knows. But this is definitely another film that I am excited for and will be keeping an eye on. What do you think about The Counselor, too much of a good thing? Or the more the merrier when it comes to great actors? Let us know in the comments!

Anthony Hopkins IS Alfred Hitchcock!

Whaddup Cinema Reconists!  Today, courtesy of People, we get our first look at Anthony Hopkins in the upcoming film Hitchcock!

Which Hitch is which?!?

One of my all time favorite actors playing one of my all time favorite directors?  Yes please!  The biopic will center around Alfred Hitchcock’s production of the 1960 classic Psycho.  While growing up, I became very familiar with and fond of Hitchcock’s work through my mom, a huge fan herself (The Birds is one of our favorite films of all time).  She was the original family horror/thriller aficionado.  While many of my childhood  friends were not allowed to watch such things, my mother was always willing let me watch ANY horror movie I pleased with her (just as long as there was no nudity… because, while monsters, murderers, and mayhem are clearly acceptable, bare breasts apparently send young children into a frenzy of mind melting chaos).  Like her, I was immune to the scares and simply became fascinated with the entire genre, which then led to my current state of horror-loving fanaticism.

Maybe I can convince Condog (Connie, my mom, to people who aren’t down with the lingo) to come along with Cinema Recon when Hitchcock hits theaters in 2013…


New Expendables 2 Images! Chuck Norris Gives “The Stare”

New images are out for the ultra awesome, ultra hardcore, ultra old ass 80′s action stars movie The Expendables 2. The images answer the question everyone was asking after they first Expendables, and once they heard about a sequel… just how much damage are The Terminator and John McClane really going to do in this movie!? We got nothing more than a couple minutes with each of them in The Expendables. I think was a disappointment to everyone for how much the whole action packed cast was hyped up in the advertisements.

But alas, be worried not young fan of old ass action stars! We can definitely see from these images that they are out to kick some ass and blow some shit up! I mean, blow some stuff up… sorry Chuck please don’t karate chop me. I know you and Sly had a big argument regarding the swearing in Expendables 2, and I wouldn’t want to offend you. My humble apologies dear master of the roundhouse.

As you can see from the image below, Bruce Willis is making the “Jersey Shore puckered up lips for a cell phone self portrait” face while he unleashes hell on the bad guys. Sly Stallone is giving the classic “say hello to my little friend!” upside down smiley face while he destroys everything in his path. And Arnold is constipated… but none the less shotgun blasting the shit out of someone. Probably someone who was in front of him in the bathroom line.

EEYYE NEEEEEDAAA TO POOOOOOPPPP!!!!!

While that terrible trio is busy shooting up an unsuspecting office complex (an unsuspecting office complex that is no doubt highly involved in terrorist activity), we get a glimpse at what Mr. Delta Force himself has been up to. In this case, destroying the absolute shit out of a couple of parked cars. Jesus Christ Chuck, a note on their windshield would have been sufficient! Unloading all three of those clips might have been a wee bit much ya think? I can see it now, the owner of the car runs outside upon hearing loud explosions only to see his car blown to shit by none other than Chuck Norris himself. He yells out, “What the FUCK Chuck!? I leave my car for two fucking minutes to go take a shit, and first Arnold cuts in front of me in line, then him, Willis, and Sly start shooting up the whole damn place, and now you’ve ‘sploded my car into a thousand pieces!!! And to top it all off, is that a flat tire I see!?”  To which Chuck Norris slowly takes off his awesome, purple tinted Ray Bans and quietly answers “Yes, and you’re welcome.”

Don't ever let you car look at me like that again.

The Expendables 2 is scheduled to open August 17th, 2012 in the United States of Mo-Fo’in America.

Images via Collider.


New Pics of Johnny Depp as Johnny Depp! (Tonto)

Does anyone know how to change a old phrase? Do I have to file paper work with the Government, or just start saying it a lot? I think I will do both actually just to be safe. Does anyone know the mailing address for the Department of Old Phrases? I want to change the old saying “nothing is certain but death and taxes” to the new Jake approved saying “nothing is certain but death and taxes and the fact that Johnny Depp will wear face paint in any movie that he ever does. Fact.” Anyone know how I go about doing that? Email me.

A new image has surfaced on the Internets which shows Johnny Depp as Tonto from the upcoming Gore Verbinski film The Lone Ranger starring Armie Hammer and Johnny Depp. You may recall that the previous image of Johnny Depp as Tonto showed us that he probably shouldn’t be the first person at the top of your list if you need a bird sitter. But what both pictures do show rather nicely, is Johnny Depps affinity for face paint… Jesus Christ!!! Is it getting ridiculous to anyone else!? Am I the only person who can’t stand this anymore!? I swear Paul is just putting out these pictures just to mess with me because he thinks it’s hilarious how much I get worked up over stupid Johnny Depp and his face painting antics!

I think at this point, Johnny Depp has instructed his agent to not take any scripts unless it explicitly states on the first page that his character will be in full face paint the entire movie. Actually, I am going to write a script called “You Get to Cover Your Face in Paint” and see if he signs on, ten bucks says he will. And I’ll even bet you he does the sequel “You Get to Cover Your Face in Paint and Helena Bonham Carter Will Be There Too.” Is it possible to file a restraining order on someone elses behalf? I am going to file a three way restraining order for Johnny Depp, Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter. The three of those people and face paint shouldn’t be allowed to be within a 15 mile radius of one another. This madness has to stop people!

Anyways, back to the new Lone Ranger picture. So this time we see Depp with mucho face paint but sans the dead bird on his head. I am guessing after a couple days in the hot sun someone at the Health Department finally said, “hey… you know you got a rotten dead bird on your head?” so they 86’d the bird, or at least threw it in the fridge for the time being. This pic is just more of the same if you ask me, or at least it’s exactly what I was expecting from a Depp movie. I for one am not looking forward to this flick very much. I have the feeling Depps Tonto will be very similar to his Captain Jack Sparrow, but with a Native American accent and not a… umm, pirate accent. Lots of antics, distinct accent and odd geastures just underneath more facepaint. He is one step away from saying “wheres the rum?” in my book. But hey, I’ll see it. I guess I am pretty impressed though, that makeup really does make him look like a middle age Native American woman.

I hope this make up covers my pimple...

The Lone Ranger is set to hit theatres May 31st, 2013.

Image via Badass Digest.


First Trailer out for Looper! (It Will Be Up Yesterday…)

The much anticipated trailer for Rian Johnson‘s Looper is here! Well, at least it’s been much anticipated by me. I am a huge fan of Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and of course, being a red blooded male living within the continental United States, Bruce Willis is one step shy of being my hero. The official synopsis is as follows:

“In the futuristic action thriller Looper, time travel will be invented – but it will be illegal and only available on the black market. When the mob wants to get rid of someone, they will send their target 30 years into the past, where a “looper” – a hired gun, like Joe (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) – is waiting to mop up. Joe is getting rich and life is good… until the day the mob decides to “close the loop,” sending back Joe’s future self (Bruce Willis) for assassination. The film is written and directed by Rian Johnson and also stars Emily Blunt, Paul Dano, and Jeff Daniels. Ram Bergman and James D. Stern produce.”

The story itself seems pretty awesome. If it has to do with time travel, sign me up! A lot of people get all “logical” with time travel movies and start poking holes in the plot immediately… “Well now wait a minute guys, if Bruce Willis is sent to the past that means that obviously Joseph Gordon-Levitt doesn’t die in the movie because if he dies then Bruce Willis wouldn’t have been around in the future to have been sent back in the first place…” Yada yada yada you’re dumb guy just go with it. As long as their aren’t major holes in the plot, I’m all for suspending belief about the possible paradoxes involved in any time travel movie. I mean come on, why didn’t Skynet just crush the skull of teenage Kyle Reese when they captured in him in Terminator: Salvation? “Hey kid what’s that over there…?” *squash*

One thing I noticed about the trailer was how Joseph Gordon-Levitts voice sounds pretty damn awesome compared to Bruce Willis. I’m not sure if that is JGL just doing some fine voice work, or if they used anything in post production on his voice, but either way I think it sounds pretty awesome. Also, there does appear to be some small facial make-up or prosthetics worn by JGL to make him look a bit more like Willis. I am not too sure how I feel about this, maybe after watching the movie for a bit I will buy into it but I just hope it’s not too distracting.

I was definitely a fan of Johnsons other movie with Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Brick, so I am excited to see what these two can do again. I am a bit hesitant about the overall look and tone of the movie though, it seems at times very “Kill Bill-ish” but then at other times a very straightforward action movie. I guess we will have to just wait and see how it all pans out, Looper is set to open September 28th in the US.

What are your thoughts on the trailer? Looks like good ‘ol fashion time traveling mob-hit-man fun? Or too far of a stretch for Levitt to be Willis?


Holy sectional-compartmentalized-military-outfit Batman!

Where is it written that sequels have to be bigger in scope and more intricate than their predecessor? I really don’t get it. I mean we see it everywhere. Classic examples, Spiderman 3 or Transformers: Dark Side of The Moon… I mean come on… REALLY!? But what I don’t get even more, is why the costume has to also follow suit (no pun intended… OK, it was kind of intended) and get increasingly more complicated and larger in scope and more… uhhh, patch-ier?

Case in point is the most recent Christopher Nolan Batman trilogy. I recently saw the cover of Entertainment Weekly where Batman (Christian Bale) and Catwoman (who cares, its Catwoman) are featured front and center on the cover in their cosutmes from The Dark Knight Rises. I mean after all, it’s their Summer Movie Preview Issue! But what I cant get over is the over-complication of the Batsuit! I understand that this take on Batman is supposed to be grounded in reality as much as possible. And that the Batsuit is an adaptation of military clothing and armor. And that its supposed to provide functionality while still maintaining protection… but come on!!! Why do they feel the constant need to evolve the Batsuit into something way more than it needs to be!? We all remember seeing George Clooney and thinking… “Ummm, why the fuck does the Batsuit have nipples?” I understand the concept behind its look and development, but I personally feel they went a bit over the top here. I think it gets to a point where they begin to over-complicate things and it starts to distract from the character.

I am sure it wont be that bad or really noticeable at all when we see it on the big screen. I mean after all how often will you see Batman just standing still in broad day light? Usually it’s quick cut action scenes in the cover of darkness so there probably wont be time to analyze all the Kevlar patch locations. But I’ll still know they’re there. Like bedbugs in a cheap hotel – You cant see ‘em but you know they’re there… just waiting to ruin your hotel experience… the bedbugs, not Batman.

Just add water!

The Dark Knight Rises is set to open in the U.S. July 20th, 2012. And you bet we will be front and center Kevlar patches and all.


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